Meanwhile In Sherwood Forest...

Eventide in Sherwood Forest and the legendary Merry Men were lounging around the campfire quaffing mead and devouring a freshly roasted boar; jolly old Friar Tuck happily consuming the swine's bristly nether regions with great relish while Little John sucked on his trotters...

...the boars trotters, not the Friars...

The inseperable pair, the dashing Robin Hood and the delectable Maid Marian, were perched together in the branches above and locked in such a passionate embrace that all the squirrels modestly clutched their nuts and averted their eyes.

Oh Robin, i'll never regret the day i bought you those magnificent green tights and oh how well you fill them, especially at this very moment, my Lord.

Oh my sweet Marian, how you make my bow stiffen, how you cause my quiver to quiver and how i long to release the flaming arrows of burning love that i have set aside for you.

The men below, upon hearing all this, laughed and shook their heads, rolling their eyes at each other although each secretly wishing that it was upon their own lap that perky Maid Marian was presently so gleefully perched, in fact, everywhere the fair maid went she found herself ogled half to death and frothingly lusted after beyond compare.

But she was Robin's girl and always would be, sharing their days in wild adventure and reckless swashbuckling while every night was spent aloft in the leafy canopy entwined in a tempestuous knot of deep devotion and desire as their romantic efforts caused leaves to rustle, branches to shake and innumerable conkers to fall.

© Sean Barrett - Nov 2010